2020: Year in Review
Holy Mother of Cthulhu. What a year.
1. What did you do in 2020 that you’d never done before?
Quarantined. Thank you Covid-19.
2. Did anyone close to you die or give birth?
One of my former students and Silas’s friend committed suicide at the beginning of the pandemic. I held a socially distanced memorial service in our back yard around a camp fire for Silas and a few kids from that friend group. I loved that girl. It helped me to help Silas through it.
3. What countries did you visit?
*snort… choke… slightly hysterical laughter*
4. What would you like to have in 2021 that you lacked in 2020?
I would like to see people in person. I would like to hug people, which is funny cause I am not a touchy feely person. I would like to not have the emotional weight that comes with every fricken decision to leave the house. I would like to not have to strategically plan getting to play with my nieces. I have to keep this very specific to me because if I think larger I just start to cry.
5. What dates from 2020 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Why. Why am I subjecting myself to reflecting on this year… of all years. *sigh* March 15th. Shut down day for us in CA. Also that day in August that was super surreal cause the sky was doing weird things thanks to CA being on fire.
6. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Surviving. Emotionally, physically and mentally. Oh, and I made myself a petticoat! And I finally tried a new paint technique that I have always wanted to try.
7. What was your biggest failure?
I am calling mercy on this one. I am giving myself and everyone mercy and grace. Lots and lots of it.
8. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Funny that. So as the stress of this year continued to extend, I started pulling my hair out so much that I developed bald spots. This was concerning to say the least; I have always done this, but never to this extent. I was diagnosed with Trichotillomania. It is a Body Focused Repetitive Behavior and it turns out I have a whole slew of them. Here is an excerpt from Phycologytoday.com:
“Body-focused repetitive behaviors, or BFRBs, are a set of disorders categorized by self-grooming routines that essentially go awry. These include pulling, picking, biting, or scraping one's hair, skin, or nails. The disorders include trichotillomania (compulsive hair pulling), dermatillomania (compulsive skin picking, also called excoriation disorder), and onychophagia (compulsive nail biting). The prevalence of BFRBs is estimated to be at least 3 percent of the population, affecting both children and adults.”
I started Cognitive Behavioral Therapy a few months ago. And I shaved my head so that I could not pull it and instead it could start growing back.
I also had a bone spur develop on my tailbone back in march. Within a month I could not sit for longer than 5 minutes without pain. Three butt shots later and it is only 70% healed. I get a new kind of shot (Platelet Rich Plasma) tomorrow to try and finally resolve it.
9. What was the best thing you bought?
Our big pandemic buy was a Bidet. I love it. Why, oh why, did I ever think smearing with paper was a reasonable solution to toilet hygiene?!?
10. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Silas: The kid is performing better in school through distance learning then he did in school. Straight A’s this semester. He also has been teaching himself how to program.
Micah: Micah’s strengths do not lay in online learning, but he is working hard anyway. He also has kept our house light and full of laughter all these months.
Shaun: Shaun graduated this month from Graduate School!!! Judicial Administration.
11. Where did most of your money go?
Books, that bidet, art supplies, and a couple raspberry pies (not the edible kind… it’s a nerd thing). Although most of it went to bills, but I figure that is a given. Spending was down this year.
12. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Seeing Black Lives Matter really get some traction. Art days with my nieces. And on Halloween I did dry ice science experiments with the nieces and then after dark we swam in the hot tub with millions of glow sticks!!! BEST. HALLOWEEN. EVAR.
13. What was your song for this year?
Aside from my 2 musical “discoveries (Q.#22) It is super strange how little music I listened to this year. It was all about the podcasts.
14. Compared to this time last year, are you happier or sadder?
Neither. I am just emotionally exhausted. But I fully recognize that we have had it good comparatively. Even though I could not move forward in what I want to do next career wise, Shaun did not lose his job and three of the four of us are introverts and kind of welcomed getting to turn into Hermits.
15. Compared to this time last year, are you thinner or fatter?
So we started watching this show called The Great British Bake Off and we realized very quickly that we would have to pace ourselves, as Shaun and I were gaining weight at an alarming rate. I mean, it does not help that we were forced to become more sedentary, but still… pound cakes, treacle tarts and cookies on a nightly basis are kind of a recipe for disaster. I have managed to get down to and maintain 173 pounds. Goal for next year is to get back down to 165.
16. Compared to this time last year, are you richer or poorer?
Probably richer since we stayed home.
17 and 18. What do you wish you’d done more or less of?
I wish I had reached out to more people and sooner. I could come up with more but I am choosing to go back to that mercy and grace thing.
19. How did you spend the Holidays?
We never liked Thanksgiving, so it was not a hardship to ditch that one. Solstice we did another Game-the-Game day, walked a labyrinth, and played via zoom with a dear friend. We did not participate in Christmas celebrations this year. We missed family and the traditional soup and bread, but it is not a religious holiday for us anymore so it was not too difficult in that regard.
20. What was your favorite TV program?
The Great British Bake Off.
21. What was the best book you read?
I read well over 100 books this year but they were mostly duds or just average. I discovered Sharon Shinn and Maggie Shane, and I enjoyed them a lot. But my favorite discovery is Lori Foster. I read lots of romance when I am stressed out. *grin*
22. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Lemonade (full album) by Beyoncé. I loved the song Lemonade back when it came out, but did not listen to the whole album. Or watch the movie. My bad. Then I listened to this podcast called Dissect and they do a season on the entire album and I can’t even how awesome it is. Highly recommend.
23. What Podcast captured your attention this year?
By the Book (two women faithfully follow the advice one self-help book per month), Hit Parade (Music chart analysis… I find it fascinating), Ologies (Ally smartly interviews Experts in the scientific world), and by far my favorite, Dear Hank and John (Where two brothers give dubious advice and keep you updated on the news from AFC Wimbledon and Mars… I have been a nerdfighter since Brotherhood 2.0 and can’t believe I didn’t grab their podcast sooner).
24. What did you want and get?
Luckily I did not go into this year with too many wants. I wanted Shaun to make it through his Master’s Program. Check. I wanted to figure out my next step career wise. Sorta Check? I couldn’t actually take any steps forward, but I did make a decision.
25. What did you want and not get?
To plan our next dive adventure trip with our friends holed up in the Sawtooth mountains. I also wanted the boys to be able to get their drivers licenses along with jobs. That was a fat nope.
26. What was your favorite film of this year?
I am adjusting this category to what was the favorite thing you watched, cause yah. I loved Enola Holmes and Unorthodox (both on Netflix). The second, Unorthodox, is not a normal watch for me. It is based on a true story, it is quiet and moves at a languid pace, and I was so mesmerized by it we ended up binging it and watched all 4 parts in one night.
27. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
42th – At that point we were bubbling with my mom and dad and my sister’s family. We ate BLT’s and Brownies and just hung out together… I think. I honestly can’t remember.
28. What’s one thing that would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Lack of a Global Pandemic. A lot more Justice. Oh, and the impeachment of the president actually resulting in his removal from office.
29. What kept you sane?
My husband. And two teenage boys who are funny and empathetic and kind.
30. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
None.
31. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2020.
A new version of the same old lesson… life is complex and messy.
32. Was there anything that surprised you?
We did not actually have to evacuate for any fires this year!
33. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
I have vacillated between two songs in terms of lyrics all year.
“It’s the end of the world as we know it…” REM
“Dust in the wind… All we are is dust in the wind…” Kansas
On the one hand is Holly Shiznits Batman the world is ending!!! And on the other is the recognition that we have been there, done it all before. There is nothing new under the sun and we really aren’t that important in the scheme of things.
34. What am I grateful for?
My husband
My boys
The removal of the Golden Handcuffs.
My home
Podcasts and books galore
Learning how to make Treacle Tart
Lots of food storage
Our health
Art supplies
